Well, for those of you who know me well, you know how much I LOVE Christmas time....for so many reasons!!! But, the last 4 years have been a little tough on me. Ever since I lost my Daddy, Christmas just is a little harder. My Daddy too loved Christmas~ we loved loving it together. Now, don't get me wrong, my 1st Christmas without my Daddy was my first Christmas with Cole, so in that aspect, it is more special than ever. But, I still have a hard time being the "Christmas Nazi" as Matt had referred to me for so many years. This year is no different. I feel a huge void. But, this year, I have come to realize that I always will. So, today I will stop looking for whatever it is that I thought would magically "fix it". But, I also realize just how lucky I am and how much I adore my 2 children. That in itself makes me happier than I could ever imagine. Matt & I are so proud of them. In addition to these things, there are some other "thankfuls" that are on my mind:
~My family: as dysfunctional as we may be at times (hehehehe), we love each other very much. This has been proven so much this week. My grandmother fell and broke her back a week ago. As you can imagine, she is in tremendous pain. She will be having surgery this Tuesday morning, but until then, we ALL have been taking turns helping care for her. My grandfather can't do it all. Yes, all of us~ me, Cindy (my mom), Anita, Donna, Julie have been helping with her. As well as all of their teenage children who do whatever we ask with no complaints. God has blessed us with such love~
~My children: even though I think they are giving me gray hair for Christmas, I still love them with every beat of my heart. No really- I am so proud of them. Cole will be 5 in January and is such a sweet, compassionate little boy. He was having some problems a few months ago with a little bit of sassing, but it seems that was a phase. He's got such a wonderful personality. And, Taylor- wow....what a big girl she's becoming. She will be 3 in March, but is certainly going on 18. She's so independent!! Wonder where she gets that from???!!!
~Changes in my life: some of you know and some of you don't. But, about 3 months ago, I felt as if God was pushing me in a new direction for my life career wise. So, on January 10th, I will be taking the Praxis II test. And, if it is meant to be, I will (hopefully) find a job teaching Business Ed to High Schoolers. I am VERY excited about this possibility. I have always had an "itch" to teach, but just didn't think that it would ever happen. But, I know that it is totally up to God....not me. So, the next few months will be very exciting for me.
~Wayne & Cindy: or, "Paco" & LuLu" as my kids call this. This is my mom and my step-dad. I never in a million years would have thought that I could have been so lucky. My mom found a wonderful man to marry after my Daddy passed away. Not only does he love me, but he is absolutely in love with my kids. He cares so much about us...he loves us. He would do anything for my children and I know without a doubt that he would do anything in the world for me too. I'm so thankful for that. I don't think that I could ever express in words to him just how thankful I am for that. My mom is my best friend.....she listens to me, she laughs at me and she loves me unconditionally.....WOW!!! How awesome is that???!!!!
~Thank you Jesus for blessing me and my family so dearly. Thank you for who you are and what you did to give us eternal life. And, this Christmas, I pledge to not get caught up in the material side of Christmas, but to truly be thankful Jesus, my family and my life!!!
I hope you all have a WONDERFUL Christmas!!!
Love to you all!!!!